Come on, if you didn’t see this
coming, you must be very new to this blog. If there’s a horror movie out, no
matter how bad it might be, I will watch it. I still remember seeing the first
movie and not understanding what had happened until we see those fatal, final
shots. I went into this movie with pretty high expectations. I should have reset
that to something far more realistic. The original movie was made with
practically no script and a shoe-string budget. This movie had way more hype
and funding and yet it still was basically the same movie.
In case you’ve never heard of the
original, The Blair Witch Project, the movie centers around a found-footage
premise where three filmmakers go out to investigate the folk lore about the
Blair Witch and never return. The movie itself was quite revolutionary at the
time. The found-footage genre was barren and the idea of having the actors
double as cameramen saved majorly on the budget. The three filmmakers decide to
camp in the woods, which are purported to be haunted, and terrifying things
begin to happen. The map is the first thing to get lost (long before GPS) and
the group walk in circles for days. One member goes missing and then the last
two members end up at an abandoned house, never to leave it. The movie ends on
that note. A sequel was made, but I never subjected myself to it, so I couldn’t
tell you what it’s about.
Fast forward about fourteen years
and the audience meets James, the then four-year old brother of Heather, the
only woman in the first movie. James stumbles upon some guy uploading a video
to YouTube with a clip that may, or may not, be his sister. The footage was
supposedly found near where she disappeared. James’ friend, Lisa is making a
movie for school and decides to make James’ search for his sister the subject.
The two are joined by James’ childhood friend Paul and his girlfriend Ashely
(both are African American). The four set out to meet the guy who found the
footage. The audience meets Lane and Talia. These two are characterized as the
usual small town hicks. They insist on going out with the friends and this
creates some tension, as Lane has a Confederate flag prominently displayed in
his house.
Without divulging too many
SPOILERS the movie follows very closely to the original. The African American
characters are the first ones to be attacked or go missing, fulfilling the
usual horror trope. The antics that plagued the first film crew repeat, though
with some added assistance from Lane and Talia, who plant some evidence, only
to be proven to have planted the items in the first place. It is at this point
that the group disbands. Lane and Talia are sent away and the other four
friends try to make their way out of the forest, only to get hopelessly lost.
The rest of the story devolves further into the original, instead of really
introducing anything new except the idea that you shouldn’t look the witch in
the eye.
And this is the point where I was
more frustrated than anything. This was the chance for the filmmakers, real ones,
not the ones in the movie, to add to the lore, to enhance what has been said
about the Blair Witch. I think of the infinite possibilities. It almost
cheapened the movie to have her on-screen, however grainy that might have been.
The concept of ‘time travel’ through the movie was also mind numbing. Lane and
Talia are lost for a week, but James and Co (the characters being followed) are
lost for a half a day. This is never fully explained. There were so many places
where the story could have improved upon what was a pretty strong base, but it
just fell flat and wasn’t scary at all. For my new-found Hina test, this did
pass, but barely. There were three female characters, all strong in their own
right. There were two minorities in the movie, one making it almost to the end
of the movie. None seemed forced into the story. I have to give this a pass on
the Hina test.
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