Movie Review: Lights Out

Like a moth to a flame, I saw a new horror movie being released and I had to get to my local AMC and see what all the buzz was about. The early hype set this horror movie as something new and terrifying. After having seen it, I’d liken it to Silent Hill, but not nearly as terrifying. I would be lying if I didn’t admit that I had my eyes covered within the first five minutes. After that, I was curious enough to look a few times.

The story starts off with Bella Swann’s dad, Billy Burke, working in a textile company that has mannequins in it. Faceless, expressionless plastic people are terrifying. The cleaning lady (see token Hispanic woman) sees something scary, gets away and warns Burke. He shrugs it off, until it comes after him. He immediately notices it doesn’t like light, but this does him little good as ‘it’ gets him and the audience is shown a mangled corpse of what once was Bella Swann’s father.

The movie picks up with a young boy (God, could I watch one horror movie without children in it?) and he hears his mom (Maria Bello) speaking to someone, though no one is home. When he goes to investigate, his mother is talking to a darkened doorway into what I assume is either her bathroom or closet. There is no one there. He creeps back to his bed, but there is a distinct scraping noise that’s happening and he doesn’t sleep. At school, he keeps falling asleep. His mother is called, but she doesn’t come get him. Enter the hot older sister with the adorable boyfriend. The two take him home, but mom is all out of sorts (crazy). The daughter takes the brother back to her place and the weird scratching happens at her apartment, the lights from the ‘tattoo’ sign casting an eerie red glow, the only thing that saves the girl. The next morning, social services (token African American) comes to take the boy back, as what the sister did was akin to kidnapping.

This lights a fire under older sister and she begins an exhaustive investigation to see what is causing all of this mayhem. I would have to SPOIL the movie further. What follows, in the movie, is a sort of convoluted path to a revealing ending that is foreshadowed about halfway through the movie. The evil thing is a girl who is presumed to be downright evil. One could argue that being isolated from everyone due to an allergy to light would make anyone a little twisted.

The story has wonderfully vivid characters: the mentally unstable mother, the troubled sister, the annoying brother and the endearing boyfriend. There are hardly any minorities to speak of, so if you like movies with just white people in them, this is for you. Two minorities do get killed towards the end, but thankfully, most of the white people are unharmed. Despite the complete lack of substantive diversity, the movie is helmed by a young (white) woman and the chief antagonist is also a young (presumed to be white) woman. After seeing Ghostbusters, I suppose more women heading movies is a good thing. Even though reviewers felt like the story came together, and while it was left open for a sequel, it just never resonated with me. The scares were mostly of the scare variety and the twisted end was grossly foreshadowed. I would be intrigued to see an attempt at a sequel. Maybe have one of the kids carry the memory and let the evil return? It could prove quite interesting. Overall, for $6, it was okay.

Movie Review: Breaking Dawn Part 2

I got caught up in the craze and hype of Twilight some five years ago.  All my friends were raving about the books, raving about Edward, raving about Bella.  I’ll admit it, curiously got the better of me.  I picked up the first book, blew through it, and devoured the subsequent books.  Lucky for me, by the time I got to the series, the final book was about to come out.  Once the series was over, I can’t say I was gobsmacked by the ending, or the writing or characterisations.  But what Stephanie Meyer had in spades was the ability to make Bella relatable to practically every woman out there.  On the surface, Edward and Jacob are both great guys, in theory, but when you look closer, Edward has stalker, controlling tendencies and Jacob isn’t quite house-broken.  I’ve been forced to move Team Jacob after reading a very thoughtful essay from Twilight and Philosophy.  Read on at your own risk, possible SPOILERS ahoy.

If you’re not familiar with the story (for some strange reason), the cliff-notes version is, girl feels awkward in life, drawn to a guy who’s mysterious and gorgeous, wackiness ensues.  In the first book, Bella, our title character discovers the truth about Edward and his family, falling in love with a vampire.  On the shoulders of such pop culture phenomena as Buffy the Vampire Slayer, author Stephanie Meyer adds to the lore, allowing the vampires to be seen in daylight among other curious changes.  The first story is more of an introduction to the relationship between Bella and Edward and the impact it will have on the rest of the characters.  Edward knows he should avoid Bella, but can’t because she is ‘perfect’ for him, though she never truly understands this.  The first book ends happily ever after in the sense that they are going to work on being together.  In the second book, New Moon, Bella, frequently accident-prone, has a mishap at the Cullen house and Edward leaves town, sending Bella into a depressive state. She is only woken from this by her childhood friend Jacob.  The two hit it off, but Bella never cares for Jacob the way he cares for her.  In an effort to spice things up in her life, she goes cliff-diving, causing a domino effect that almost sees Edward commit suicide.  Bella races to Italy with Alice to save him.  At the end of the second book, Edward proposes to Bella, despite her being underage.  In the third book, the antagonist from the first book returns, wreaking havoc and bringing to light, once again, that Bella is weak in her state as a human.  The majority of the third book revolves around the romantic triangle between Jacob, Bella and Edward.  Stalwart fans know Bella would never chose anyone over Edward, but Jacob continues to pine for her.  The third book ends with Jacob running off and Edward and Bella preparing their wedding, after their high school graduation.  I could make some comments on this, but I’ll just press right through.

The final book was anticlimactic to say the least, but the story is based solely on being in love, not to be confused with Harry Potter, where Harry is faced with issues of right and wrong and making difficult decisions. In the films, the directors have done fantastic jobs turning the weak source material into something watchable.  Breaking Dawn, the final book, had the movie broken into two parts.  I’ve posted a review for the first movie, you can read it if you like.  The second movie picks up right where the first leaves off.  Bella has transformed to a vampire and her transformation is astounding.  The change in Kristen Stewart, while subtle, is exactly as I had imagined it while I’d read it.  Bella’s new worldview is amazing to see.  The focus of the books has always been from Bella’s perspective, and having her transform and allow the audience to experience the new wonders of being immortal gave a sense of closure I didn’t expect I needed.  The cast of characters expands drastically in the final movie, bringing the global concept of vampires to an entirely new level.  Carlisle, the leader of the Cullen clan, goes to great lengths find as many allies as he can once they know the Volturi (read governing body for vampires) believe Bella has created an immortal child, a kid vampire.  The crisis becomes all too real once Alice vanishes with Jasper, leaving the rest of the Cullen’s to wonder what she is playing at.  As a vampire, Bella too possesses a super power, one that explains Edward’s inability to read her, though does not explain her visions in New Moon.  Bella is able to extend this skill with some help.  The final battle in the movie culminates in a slight ‘gotcha’ for both author and director.  I will refrain from giving it away, the ending providing a type of ‘almost’ situation that probably should have happened, Meyer too fearful to kill off any of her beloved characters.

The movie was the best twilight movie without a doubt.  But as I’ve heard all week, that isn’t saying much. The Twilight series is not a life-changing series, the struggles Bella faces are based mostly on her romantic interests and little else.  This vapid, somewhat shallow goal makes the entire series pale in comparison to other more heart-wrenching series.  To make the Twilight series have a greater meaning was a tall task, but was done in a somewhat agreeable fashion.  The movies increased the tension in predictable ways, not taking anything away from the books, adding value with a surprisingly good cast.  The cast is the one thing that surprised me the most.  There will always be detractors for Kristen Stewart, and as someone who’s normally not a fan of hers, I was thoroughly impressed by her transformation from the first movie to this final movie.  She never wavered, ignoring the critics and delivering, what I would argue, is an absolutely stunning performance as the title character in a world-wide beloved series.  Stewart raised her quality as vampire Bella and did so in a way that made me respect everything she’s been through with this franchise.  In comparison, Robert Pattinson and Taylor Lautner were mediocre, the rest of the cast paling in comparison to Stewart’s provoking performance.  I really can’t say enough about how I was just shocked by her delivery of the role.  She could have hammed it up, dialled it in as Tobey Maguire and co famously did in the final Spiderman movies.   The final touch that really convinced me of this was the credits, not even Potter took the time to do this, though Rings did.  The credits rolled with images of every actor in almost any role for the entire series, including those that weren’t seen in the final instalment.  There is a lot you can say that is wrong with the Twilight series, but they are a class act.

Movie Review: The Dark Knight Rises

Like many of you, I get caught up in the excitement around franchises.  As a kid, I loved watching Batman: The Animated Series as it aired when I came home from school.  Not to date myself further, I actually liked Batman Forever as well.  The franchise was reinvented, on the heels of Spiderman, X-men and Superman.  I’m sad to say the best in this series was the second movie, The Dark Knight, and there is no other way around it.  There may be SPOILERS ahead, so read at your own risk.


I bought tickets for the trilogy last night, hunkering down at six for the first movie.  As the credits rolled, I turned to my friend Lay and said, ‘I don’t remember any of this.’  Batman Begins was released in 2005, though it seemed far more dated.  The first movie introduced the audience to a newer Batman with the same origin story as the original.  Christian Bale playing troubled Bruce Wayne as he seeks to make people safe by dressing up in a costume and beating people to a pulp with his bare hands.  Not a wholly sound character, but the deep flaws make the movie that much more compelling.  Seeing Batman Begins and The Dark Knight back-to-back did lend me to this true epiphany, I thought Katie Holmes was the better of the two female leads, but if your choices are her and Maggie Gyllenhaal, this really isn’t a fair competition for either of them.  This reminds me of an episode of Family Guy about both Jake and Maggie being insufferable, but it could be my limited lucidity over less than three hours of sleep.


The synopsis of Batman Begins is only relevant because the third movie ties the story together, but in all honesty, only ties the first and third movies together, glossing over the second movie almost entirely.  The critical piece to remember is the main villain, Ra's al Ghul was killed at the end of the first movie, but there is more to the story he told Bruce Wayne about what he’d lost and sent him down the path that he was on with his League of Shadows.  There are also a few cameos of characters from the first movie that are nice to see in the second and third.


In the second movie, by far the strongest of the three, we meet Joker, Batman’s greatest adversary.  What makes Joker such a great challenge is his lack of balance, in short, his insanity.  Joker has no rules and doesn’t want to make money, but kill everything in his path.  The Dark Knight came out several years ago and why this wasn’t the third in the series still baffles me.  Heath Ledger went to a great dark place within himself and to have an encore to his actions that pales in comparison is a disservice.  I won’t go into any detail summarising this movie, there should be no need.


The final instalment did what I call the ‘superhero flaw’ for movies.  In the first two movies, there were two villains for our hero to contend with, in this final set piece, we have four.  This is a testament, to me, that more doesn’t actually mean better.  Rest assured, the movie started late, and when a two hour and forty minute movie starts late, with twenty minutes of forgettable previews, the expectations grow tauter.  The story begins several years after The Dark Knight, placing Batman in hiding, as well as his alter ego Bruce Wayne.  Gotham City has been cleaned up, crime a memory.  Word begins to travel that a new ‘bad guy’ is running around, Bane.  Bane is ruthless, young and wears a crazy mask.  He also talks in a South African accent despite Bane’s original origin story setting him in South America.  He is seemingly working for ‘John’ Dagget, though in the comics, his name is Roland, it took me forever to figure out what was wrong with his name.  Bane comes to Gotham under the guise of assisting Dagget in taking over Wayne enterprises.  With the help of Selina Kyle, Catwoman, Bane gets Wayne’s fingerprints and they destroy his estate, losing all of his money.  Alfred walks out on him once he realises that Bruce, in his hampered state, expects to challenge Bane.  Catwoman walks him right into the trap and Bane, as he does in the comic, breaks Batman’s back.  He whisks Wayne to a prison halfway across the world, one he can’t easily escape from.


As my friend pointed out, for more than an hour, there was no Batman in the Batman movie.  I can appreciate the need for solid storytelling, but I sometimes struggle with this as many Twilight fans did with New Moon where there was no Edward for the majority of the story.  The advantage Batman has, other than superior writing is the fact that the movie was so long that you may not notice Batman missing for a third of it.


The story unfolds in predictable fashion here and I don’t want to continue to spoil the movie if I can help it.  Needless to say, Bruce once again overcomes his fears and returns to Gotham when it has been turned into a war zone.  Bane has trapped most of the police department and put the rich on trial, sending them to their deaths to cross the frozen river or be shot.


What started out as a manageable story begins bloated and uninteresting after a few hours.  The plethora of villains makes the movie busier than it needs to be.  And with more bad guys comes more good ones as well.  The cast has a good mix of good and bad, but there is little that makes any of it compelling.  A sub-plot with Joseph Gordon-Levitt’s Blake is almost laughable as the story comes to a close.


I want to say I’m an unbiased party, that I came in expecting a good movie, but I didn’t.  After The Dark Knight, I expected to be blown away, not bored at varying points of the movie.  It is a good movie, don’t get me wrong, and I will give credit where it is due, both Anne Hathaway and Tom Hardy are fantastic additions to the cast, but Christian Bale has long run out of any leeway from me.  The gravelly voice is also a joke and his characterisations of Wayne are more of a caricature than a representation.  Kevin Conroy, the voice actor for Batman for the past twenty years, emotes more with just his voice than Bale does with his entire body.  Even the always reliable Gary Oldman and Michael Caine aren’t nearly up to their normally high level of acting.


The only thing I can take away from this movie is disappointment.  When you wait a series out, as we fans have done with so many series, I find myself expecting more and more and more, and often times there is less and less.  On the whole, it wasn’t a bad movie, but as a viewer, an educated one about this genre, I feel more troubled by the incessant changes and additions they made instead of seeing the story for what it was.  If you distract so heavily from the source material, as David Yates does in the final Potter movies, fans often come away with mixed feelings, as I do now.  As a midnight movie, it wasn’t a bad choice, but looking back, the past three I’ve been to have all been movies that disappointed me.  And if you read this blog, you know I’ve raved about other movies, and much of it is tied up in expectation, but that isn’t all of it.  The Dark Knight Rises deserves it’s lacklustre reviews because it isn’t the blockbuster that should have followed The Dark Knight, and that is a shame.

Bella Has Nothing on Harry, Frodo and Katniss

It took me a few hours to process The Hunger Games, and when I did finally see it for what it was, it made me realise, again, how terrible Twilight is.  I’ll fully admit that Twilight is my guilty pleasure.  When it is on TV, be it FX or Showtime, and I see it, I stop and watch it.  It isn’t quite a train wreck, but it comes pretty close.  I’ve blogged about this countless times and will probably do so every time I come across any Young Adult literature that surpasses Twilight in every way. 

In Twilight, we have a girl, Bella Swan, who doesn’t feel like she fits in anywhere.  The beginning of the book places her more as the parent than the child in her relationship with her mother, and this forces her to move so her mother can live a carefree life without her.  This isn’t to say that her mother doesn’t care, but it is clear from the very beginning that the self interests of the characters will always overshadow their concern for one another.  The growing trend of this is made more real by the relationship that Bella and Edward share as the story progresses.  In even the simplest of terms, Edward is controlling and manipulative, to the point that if he weren’t super-human and good looking, any self-respecting girl would file a restraining order and have nothing to do with him.  But not Bella, no, Ms. Swan internalises this and decides that she can’t do better than Edward because he is ‘perfect’ for her and his lifestyle of eternal life is just right for her.

I could deride this story for poor writing, but that would be unfair of me, until I myself publish a novel, I have no stones with which to throw.  However, I would be overlooking the obvious by not pointing out how terrible a role model Bella and Edward both are for young kids, though Jacob is actually, for the most part, a respectable, ‘good’ kid.  He is loyal to a fault and places Bella’s needs over his own in what can only be seen as a true act of kindness and friendship, something neither Bella nor Edward ever exhibit in the entire Twilight Series.

Why this came to my mind I blame on a friend asking me to see The Hunger Games at midnight on Thursday night.  I haven’t read the books, I think I’ve said that enough, but the movie was surprisingly good, like The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe surprisingly good.  And while I have a lot of issues with the Chronicles of Narnia series, it too shares the same overall theme with the yet to be named books I’m referencing in the title.

One theme that I found in Harry Potter, Lord of the Rings and the Hunger Games that is missing from Twilight, but is an important one for kids to learn is sacrifice.  It wasn’t until I watched yet another trailer for the movie when I realised that was the piece that made Hunger Games stand out to me, more than Twilight ever will.  In the first twenty minutes of the movie, Katniss sacrifices her own life for her sister’s, knowing that by making the decision she makes, she has a very strong likelihood, if not absolute certainty, that she will die.  It is in this act that Katniss, and Suzanne Collins, brings her book to another level.  One that is built to slowly in Potter, but is alluded to just as quickly in Rings.

If you’re unfamiliar, for some odd reason, and if you’re reading this blog, you should know better than to come here without this knowledge, but both Lord of the Rings and Harry Potter embrace any number of admirable qualities, including willing to sacrifice yourself for the greater good.  In Lord of the Rings, Frodo Baggins is given the most powerful weapon ever forged, and is tasked by men (and others) much smarter and stronger than he, but he freely and willingly takes on the task of destroying the ring.  Ultimately, his sacrifice comes full circle and he does give up his mortal life, going to the Undying Lands with what is left of Elf-kind.  Frodo is forced to make a sudden decision, like Katniss, and while we come to realise that part of his sacrifice is the hold of the ring already taking effect, much of it is also a wish to save those he cares about most, as we see in his vision in Galadriel’s mirror.

In Harry Potter, a similar fate is bestowed upon the main protagonist, Harry Potter.  In the first few books, Harry doesn’t always come face to face with the sacrifice, so much as impossible situations he can’t possibly survive, as in the first two books.  But it is in the fifth book, Order of the Phoenix, where Harry fully realises that either he or Lord Voldemort will have to kill the other, because both can’t live while the other is alive.  The weight of the novels increase both in pages as well as tone once this realisation is made.  Potter goes so far as to try and elude his long-time friends Ron and Hermione in an effort to save them, but they stay with him almost until the end.  As the story draw to its close and Harry is faced with the choice to live, and be on the run for the rest of his life, endangering everyone he cares about, or sacrifice himself for everyone else to live, the choice seems easy.  He goes into the Forbidden Forest to meet his death.

In all three cases, though less so for Frodo, the characters that sacrifice themselves for the greater good are saved, in some form or fashion.  I’m basing The Hunger Games on the first movie only and not the books at all.  They all realise that while they value their own lives, there is something greater to be had if they do what is right.  And then there’s Bella.  The entire goal of Twilight seems simply to have a boyfriend/husband.  And I can certainly admit to wanting one or the other at some point, but to base an entire novel on it, that isn’t a Harlequin romance, and is geared towards kids, seems uninspired.  I think we all want to have a storybook romance, but to have no substance in that romance makes for a hard novel to stand behind.  I am happy to say that the staying power of Twilight isn’t strong, but as a guilty pleasure, I’ll continue watching it for that dream that can’t possibly be real, and puts foolish ideas in my head that are utterly unrealistic, such as men actually being chivalrous or liking you for something that isn’t shallow and derisive.  Twilight is many things, but none of it good.  Hunger Games may fill the void that Potter has left behind.  I often worried that Twilight would fill that gap, but am glad to see that isn’t the case.  I’ve resisted the urge to read The Hunger Games, but will be less able to do so as time goes on.  For those of you familiar with all four series, I am curious what your take on each is, in comparison to one another, but expect no disagreement with respect to the lack of credibility in Twilight as a redeeming novel.

Breaking Dawn Part 1 Review

As I’ve mentioned numerous times, I had the luck of getting to see Breaking Dawn before the general public thanks to being a member of the AMC Stubs program, which is free, incidentally.  If you’re any kind of fan, you can guess what kind of audience was in attendance Thursday night, and how thankful we all were not to be seeing the movie at midnight, but at the much more reasonable time of 8 PM.

All of the Twilight movies follow the books of the same name, who’s basic plot device is girl is in love with vampire and they want to be together forever.  It is really a weak plot, to say the least, and the final book in the series came in at a whimper, while the middle two books, New Moon and Eclipse, both had legs to stand on, however enfeebled.  What followed once the unmemorable trailers played, save for one with Daniel Radcliffe for his upcoming horror movie, Woman in Black, was a beautifully rendered film of good looking people dealing with a difficult situation, which wasn’t worthy of two hours of my time.

The book, Breaking Dawn is terrible, and that is being generous.  For some reason, Twilight fans rejoiced when the movie version was predicted to be in two parts; to me, that seems like we’re prolonging the pain of sitting through a poorly thought out story.  Basically, we have Bella, our main protagonist and girl who can’t possibly make good decisions, in love with Edward, a vampire who aspires to be a caricature of a character with actual substance.  As always, the few good acting moments come courtesy of Taylor Lautner, but the traction comes more from Jacob being the only reasonable character of the three.  It seems that despite his low-level dog like alter ego, he is the only one with a good head on his shoulders.  I was happy to see Esme, Elisabeth Reed, get more face time; she is a wonderful mother figure for the Cullen clan and plays it beautifully.

The overall story can’t go far in this chapter of Twilight.  Bella marries Edward, he impregnates her with a demon/vampire child and it basically kills her.  What made this movie better than average, if you can even call it that, were the scenes that played into the various feelings Stephanie Meyer takes Bella through. 

There can be a lot to be said about Kristin Stewart’s acting, but I will give her credit where it is due.  The beginning of the movie opens up a little further along than the book, and the audience is placed at the Cullen home where Alice is making preparations for the wedding to take place on the following day.  Kristin Stewart, to me, embodied that terrifying moment where you stand on the very precipe of massive change to your life.  What will change your life more than being an adult, moving out of your parent’s house and choosing someone to be your partner for life?  It is a huge decision, and to watch Bella go through the motions: panic at first, utter terror as she watched the assembled crowd and then the elation and relief when she saw Edward standing at the end of the aisle.  Call me a hopeless romantic, but the sequence was picture perfect and I give Stewart all the credit in the world for pulling it off with such ease.

The only other fantastic scene, again with Kristin Stewart, is one of the few scenes in the book that is equally written well, to a degree.  After Edward and Bella make it to Island Esme (the stupidest name Meyer could come up with no doubt), Bella takes a moment to ready herself for the consummation of the marriage, and it is hilarious.  I would never peg Stewart as having any sort of concept of timing, but the scenes are alone and she takes all kind of preparations, finally admonishing herself for being a coward, and heading out in nothing, as Alice packed only skimpy outfits.

The chemistry between Stewart and Robert Pattinson is much more palpable in this movie than in any of the others, and the subject matter, which is not appropriate for all ages, caters to that.  This movie won’t win any substantive awards, won’t satisfy curiosity and isn’t much to stand on, but of all the Twilight movies out, this one has the most merit in character development and substance.

The second half of the movie revolves around the demon child Edward impregnates Bella with and the cost that will have on her life.  Watching the slow demise of Bella is masterful and the effect on the Cullen family and Jacob is played in a way that makes it relatable to any family that has ever watched someone they love dwindle and die before their eyes.

Whether you’re a fan of Twilight or not, this movie is worth seeing, but will probably bring more laughs of exasperation than joyful moments.  I’d recommend it only to the truly hardcore Twi-hards, but think that if you give it a chance, it might actually surprise and impress you just a little.

Twilight - The Craze, The Hype and The Madness

With the upcoming release of Breaking Dawn, the first of two parts of the Twilight Saga’s finale, coming out next week (and yes, I do already have my tickets), I thought now would be a good time to discuss it’s strengths and many weaknesses.  If you’re unaware, Twilight is the story of a girl who falls in love with a guy, no really, that’s pretty much it.  The craze, for me, was the nature in which you could devour the series.  Stephanie Meyer isn’t a great author and won’t be winning any literary awards, but riding on the coattails of the ever-present vampire craze and the need for kids to read (thank you, JK Rowling), Meyer was able to capitalise and write something that was mildly digestible, but only once.

Bella Swann, what can you really say about her?  She is a bumbling idiot, really, and yet, I still find myself watching Twilight, New Moon or Eclipse when they’re on Showtime.  Bella is highly unsympathetic.  When compared to Harry Potter we see a boy who is forced into a difficult situation, not of his choosing, and he ultimately does the right thing.  With Bella Swann, we have a girl who likes some guy and changes herself for him.  Not the stuff of legend, for sure.  Bella Swann has some redeeming qualities, her mother is a complete free spirit, which, is nice, sure, but I imagine Bella being the adult in that family.  Plus, the mother picks up and goes off with her minor league ball player boyfriend and drops the kid of with the dad, who she left out of nowhere.  The story just reeks of selfishness.  This is one of many underlying issues I have with this series.

I posted a review on Amazon for Twilight and Philosophy: Vampires, Vegetarians, and the Pursuit of Immortality, one of many great pop culture and philosophy books.  While my review was not well received, I believe they call the Twi-hards, do not take kindly to any dissention among the ranks.  If you’re an Edward fan, you’re good, if you’re a Jacob fan, you’re not good.  So I read one of the essays and commented on it in my review.  I won’t go into great detail, and I owe you all a review and commentary from the Ultimate Lost version from this series, but these are great, great reads. 

The essay in question dealt with what Twilight would be like in real life.  Take a moment with me here, in real life, if some girl had some guy obsessing over her, like Edward does to Bella, would it be viewed as okay.  Let’s think about it: he doesn’t like who she talks to, so he keeps her away from Jacob, he takes her engine apart at one point.  He has all the control in the relationship, telling her that she can’t be with him, but then doesn’t leave her alone.  When he does leave her, she goes into some sort of meltdown and isolates her from everyone.

Does this sound familiar?  Not familiar like you’ve been through it, I hope, but it is an abusive relationship.  There is no better way to describe it.  He has stalker tendencies and is controlling.  To be fair, and I love to see Edward and Bella together, she should have chosen Jacob. He doesn’t ask her to change, doesn’t need her to change and likes her just the way she is.  For Bella to be with Edward, she has to forsake everything about her life to be with him.  To give all that up for one person isn’t saving the world, it’s selfish.

Additionally, think of how she treats her friends.  I grant you, none are compelling, but she uses them and tosses them away when convenient. Look at Jacob as a perfect example.  When she needed him, in New Moon, she finds great comfort in their friendship, but as soon as she hears of Edward needing her, after he cast her aside like trash, she drops everything. While romantic, the scene at the end of New Moon, with Bella telling Jacob it will always be Edward, no matter what. But what is she basing that off of?  I could digress into a diatribe about ‘love at first sight,’ but this isn’t a Romeo and Juliet scenario, by any stretch of the imagination.  Every friend Bella values don’t have a pulse.  Is it my imagination, or is this story really about suicide?

This is one of the main issues I have with this series.  Bella is headstrong, and to call her a shell of a person would be unfair, but really, she isn’t a real character.  As fans, we follow her story, go through things as she does, but does it ever resonate?  Maybe a little, in a childish sort of way, but ultimately, the end of the story saps any real value it may have had.  Bella Swann is a horrible role model for any young girl reading the series.  There is no Edward, no Jacob to fight over girls, there are no super powerful beings that you can aspire to be just by the smell of your blood, which is in and of itself completely insane.  The story is just terrible.  And yet…yet we all went to great lengths to read it, to watch the movies, to cyber-stalk the stars, I mean what.

The movies have redeemed the poorly written stories, that’s an absolute truth.  The first movie was poor, mediocre at best, really, but when the studio realised the cash cow they had, they put some money into it, no offence to the Twilight production team.  New Moon brings the story a sense of realism and also the production values go through the roof.  Eclipse builds on it and brings some very memorable scenes.  I’ll save that for another rambling blog.  The moral of this blog is Twilight = not very good books, but addictive.  Bella is not a role model, nor is Edward, I find Jacob to be neutral, once he evolves into his own by the end of the final book.  I have tickets to see the movie Thursday night, before midnight, look for a movie review then.  Stay tuned for more blogs about Twilight and how terrible it is.